


How to handle your lovestruck Goat: A user's guide

by Storylover_Vodhr



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: AU, Completely Bewildered Chara, F/M, Humor, Love-struck Asriel, Mostly Fluff, Shipping parents, So wording will be wonky, Soft female Chara, Time Skips, Vaguely in character exposition, slight plot
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-04
Updated: 2017-10-11
Packaged: 2018-09-06 10:35:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 15
Words: 8,830
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8747215
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Storylover_Vodhr/pseuds/Storylover_Vodhr
Summary: Asriel Dreemur. Goat boy, young Boss Monster, and Prince to the monster kingdom.Also, hopelessly head-over-heels in love with his best friend, Chara.This can only end well.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> So, Here's a new Chara/Asriel Story. It's gonna be in a tiny little vignette style, so it'll jump around a lot. 
> 
> But hey, should be fun, right?

Chara didn't ask for much. 

A bit of food every now and then. The opportunity to enjoy a good book, on occasion. And, maybe, just maybe, enough time to sleep a decent's night rest.

"Hey, Chara. Can I sleep with you?"

And yet again, Asriel seemed to insist upon ruining that plan. 

"Ugh, Asriel... It's..."

Chara looked over to the clock on the wall. 

"It's midnight. Go to bed."

The small Goat boy gave a huff, and shook his head. "But your bed is comfier!"

The first child gave a snort. "Yeah. And it's MY bed. Shoo."

Asriel shook his head in refusal. "Please? I'll give you some chocolate?"

Chara woke up a bit more at the offer, before sighing. She did like herself some chocolate. 

She spent a moment considering this fact, before sighing, and scooting over to make room for the small ball of fluff. "Fine."

And, at that, the goat boy gave a small squeal of excitement, and jumped into the bed, immediately snuggling up against the bewildered girl. 

"Night Chara!"

"Uh, goodnight, Azzy."


	2. Chapter 2

"Azzy, whatchya drawin'?"

The small goat-boy, who had, up until now, been drawing peacefully, jumped in surprise at the very unexpected voice, and, in an split-second act of desperation, attempted to hide his current drawing from the curious eyes of his suddenly appearing best friend. 

"Uh, It's nothing!"

Chara, for all her faults, saw through the deception immediately, and gave the small monster a frown. Did he really think he could hide something like that from her so easily?

She started to move forward to contradict him, but, before she could, a thought came to mind. Toriel always said that she was awfully quiet. She could just... sneak attack him. "Oh, really? Well... if that's the case..."

The human forced back a smile, and turned around, pretending to walk away as if bored. She even went as far as to leave the room, and waited for a good minute, before poking her head around the corner to see if he bought it.

And there was Asriel, guard completely down. He even returned to his drawing, which was a bonus. A distracted Azzy was a easily caught Azzy.

So, Chara waited another moment, to ensure that her prey was properly enraptured by his art, before beginning to sneak up on him. The wooden floor was perfect for her soft, human feet, and, she slowly, silently crept up on the unsuspecting goat.

"Come on! Lemme see!"

In all honesty, she didn't need to shout at him as she descended upon her now very startled prey, but the expression of sheer shock on his face was totally worth the extra difficulty in the fight. The fight went on for what seemed to be ages, but ultimately, a couple seconds later, the agile, dancing-prone human won out, if only due to surprise, and Asriel found himself pinned to the ground, with Chara sitting above him, a devious grin on her face.

"Now, Young Skywalker. You will join me, or you will die."

Asriel blinked once, before cocking his head to the side in confusion as he laid upon the ground, making a convincing imitation of a confused puppy. "Uh... huh?"

"Now... give me that paper!"

She had full control of the situation, and she knew it. And as such, it was a trivial matter to get the paper from him. And so, Chara found herself sitting on Asriel's chest, looking at the picture Asriel had drawn, before feeling a soft little pang in her chest.

"Is.... is this supposed to be me?"

Asriel, for what it was worth, tried his hardest to keep from blushing, before shaking his head vehemently in denial. "No! Uh, it's someone else!"

Chara stopped at that, and looked back down to the embarrassed goat-boy. She knew he was lying, but still. Now she was curious on how he would explain it. Maybe it would explain this situation a bit better. "Oh? Who is it, then?"

The young boss monster struggled to think of an answer, but failed to come up with one. "Uhhh..."

"Thank you."

Out of all the things Asriel had expected, that had not been one of them. "Uh, what?"

Chara simply gave him a soft smile, and looked back to the paper. "Thank you. It's... nice."

It took him a couple moments to recuperate from his surprise, (Seeing as Chara never said thank you to him for just about anything) before returning her smile, and nodding. "Your welcome."

"Now, let's go draw some more pictures of The God of Hyperdeath."


	3. Chapter 3

Asriel was... entranced.

Sure, it wasn't the hardest thing to do. He was a young ten, sheltered and Naive, and what little experience he got in the ways of the world was either from his mother-hen-esque parents, or his shy and introverted best friend. But, this current distraction, at least to him, was special.  
Very special. 

Special enough that he hid in a laundry hamper for a half hour just to see it.

Too bad the source of his distraction, Chara, would've killed him if she found out he was watching. Alright, maybe not killed, per-se, but he would've definitely got a couple ear tugs, a furious rant, maybe a pillow or two upside the head, and the coldest of shoulders possible from the girl. 

Which probably would've killed him as dead as any attack she could muster. Chara's cold shoulders were legendary, to the point of the king himself shuddering at the concept. What chance did Asriel have?

But still...

Chara sure knew how to dance. He never had been able to ask where she learned the skill, seeing as every time he had asked in the past, she had taken extreme offense to the question. And, in a strange twist, Asriel's parents actually agreed with Chara. They had even went as far as asking him to simply promise to never bring up the subject again, and that it was simply best to leave it be, and that, when she was ready, she'd tell him.

Which made sense. Chara spoke when she wanted, and not a moment before. It was what made her, well, her.

But while he swore that he wouldn't ask her again, that didn't mean that he wasn't going to watch her as she went about her practice. She was beyond graceful, and her nimble, precise moves screamed that she had not only been born to dance, but that she had been dancing since she had been born. And, as he watched her go about her movements, Asriel found that, while he knew not why he was so impressed by the movements, he frankly didn't care, and instead put his full effort into watching her.

Chara always had that affect on him. Always had, and probably always will. He didn't understand it, but he simply couldn't be bothered to think much on it. It was simply Chara.

But Asriel wasn't one to focus on that. He'd much rather watch Chara. There wasn't a single movement wasted in her spins, her twirls, and, not for the first time, Asriel cursed the laundry hamper he had hidden in, and it's ability to hinder his view so egregiously. 

Maybe if he could only-

*THUD*

Asriel didn't know why the hamper had decided to fall over as it did, but once it did so, he only had one direction to go. Out. Right into Chara's line of sight. 

And she, to his surprise, let out a surprised squeal. That was a first.

But, after a second, She finally managed to find her center, and Asriel found himself looking into her surprised and now furious red eyes. 

It was almost funny. You could always tell when Chara was furious, simply because her red eyes went from a dull, muted "firetruck" red, into a full blown "glowing hell-fire" crimson.

But, alas, the small goat boy made no effort to move, still trying to comprehend himself, and instead, waved awkwardly at his judge, jury, and soon-to-be executioner.

"Eh, Hi, Chara."


	4. Chapter 4

Chara wasn't one for many things. 

She didn't like crowds much, a result of her... situation in childhood, and what crowds of unknown people entailed in her life. She never really cared for Asparagus, it's taste and smell, and what it did to the girl's bathrooms, and frankly, she hated getting extra food, because the concept had always made her feel guilty, when she had enough, and others were getting barely anything.

She also happened to dislike heat. The land above the underground was often a cold, desolate place, the cities nearby harsh and utilitarian, the weather what one would expect to be while in the dead center of the Rockys. And so, she was used to cold, and preferred to have her sleeping experience as chilled as possible. She could curl up and find a comfy little nook to curl up in if it was cold, or, in the worst case, build a nest of anything she had at hand, be it clothes, blankets, rags, or even papers. But, if she got too hot?

Short of jumping in a lake or ice bath, there was little she could do.

And, because of this...

"Asriel, it's like, a hundred degrees. Get off."

She wasn't the biggest fan of snuggling. Ever since that fateful night, where she let herself get successfully bribed with Chocolate, Asriel had insisted upon sharing a bed with her. And, at the start, it was actually kinda nice. It had been the middle of winter, and while the underground wasn't nearly as harsh as the surface, the weather magic ensured that it was, indeed, chilly. And, because of that, it had been easy to snuggle. He was certainly fluffy enough to do it, and frankly, it was easier to do, with much less hiding in her closet with all of her blankets and clothes if she found herself to be too chilled. So, she had foolishly let him get in the habit of it. 

And now that summer had rolled around, that decision had came back to bite her in the butt.

"Asriel, I said, off!"

His only response to her pushing and prodding was a loud snort, to her disappointment. So, she pushed him again, and managed to free herself from a single one of his grasping arms. The boy was a cuddler, that's for sure, which meant that, in this case, he was a menace.

It took her a few more minutes to free herself, and a couple moments of unheard swears and curses that would've gotten her grounded, had either Toriel or Asgore heard her, but once she finally managed to get herself clear, she slunk to the floor, scowling in irritation. 

"Butt-head."

The small, whiny fluff-ball had ruined yet another night's rest. And, what was worse, now that he got the idea, she couldn't just sleep in his currently unused bed, simply because, like the lost puppy he was channeling, he'd just follow her over to that the instant he found that she had been missing. She had to remain out of sight, and he knew about her penchant for the closet.

So, she had only two options. The couch, or Toriel's chair. 

She considered the couch for a moment, before deciding to simply use the chair. It was closer to the house's magical climate control-unit, and as such, would be considerably cooler, which sounded positively divine at this current moment.

And, with her destination in mind, she roughly yanked her pillow out from under Asriel's head, stole back her thin blanket, and left the room after a quick check to ensure that her anger filled actions hadn't actually woke the small boy. But, to her luck, he remained asleep, and with that, she left, not caring if her actions had disturbed the small, still sleeping goat in the slightest. After all, he had forced this fate upon her, a fate of losing sleep and being completely overheated against her will, so she would enforce a pillow-less and blanket-less night upon him. 

It was only fair.


	5. Chapter 5

"There are twelve schools of magic monster-kind can use."

Asriel sighed in near-absolute boredom, and frankly, in his mind, he had a very good reason. This was the third time he had gotten this lecture by mom, and while it had been vaguely interesting the first time, it wasn't nearly so the second, and now that it was the third, he wanted little more than to have it over.

However, Chara was enraptured. So, that counted for something, at least. She wasn't there at the first one, and the second one was literally within her first week. So, It made sense that she'd be interested. Plus, she was, like, the biggest egghead.

"Fire, water, ice, earth, lightning, physical, mental, gravitational, Spiritual, Natural, Air, and Blood. Each has it's own abilities and limits, and some, such as spiritual, can be used by all, while others, such as Natural, gravitational, or blood magicks, can only be used by those attuned to them."

Yep. Reaaaaaaally boring. Now, she'd get onto the ways monsters could attune themselves to certain magics, and- 

"Now, humans, on the other hand, have only seven types of magic."

Wait. What?

Asriel leaned forward a bit, looking at his mother in confusion. This part was completely new. 

"Fire, water, earth, Air, Nature, Blood, and, lastly, life."

Asriel felt himself sit up with a renewed interest, and stared diligently at his mother. He should've know she would've held out on him. She always did that, adding onto the lesson when he got older. He really should've expected it.

"Now, contrary to popular belief, every human is capable of magic. However, unlike monsters, each human is unique in how attuned to their magic they are. One human can spend their entire life practicing, and be able to barely make a spark, and another could spend a week, and learn how to make a firestorm. Another unique prospect is that, unlike monster-kind, a human is locked into their school at birth. A fire mage will always be a fire mage, and no matter how hard they try, they cannot learn, say, water magic."

Asriel found himself nodding. It made sense, after all. He never did hear or know of many human mages, and the few he did know of, were specialized to the point of absurdity. But he always thought it was simply a preference thing.

But, that did raise a question in the young monster's mind. 

If humans could only be one kind of mage, what was Chara?

"Hey, Chara, what kind of mage are you?"

The question surprised both Chara and Toriel, and frankly, Asriel. He didn't even mean to voice his question, simply because, well, Chara hated to talk about herself. And, with that in mind, he found himself regretting speaking up even more as they looked at him with a surprised, and, in Chara's case, reproachful look. 

He had to salvage this, before he got Chara angry at him.

"I mean, you gotta be, like, the most awesome mage ever! I mean, I'm a fire and Nature mage like mom and dad, but you? You're probably a awesome... I don't know, Blood mage or something!"

Asriel's attempt at damage control was cut off, however, by Chara's response. "I don't have any magic. None."

"Oh."

Asriel knew she was lying. But frankly, now wasn't the time to confront her. Now was instead the time to stop being an idiot.

But, how could he fix this?

"I'm useless when it comes to magic."

Asriel was surprised by the absolute rebuttal, as well as the angry tone Chara used, but, after a moment, he pushed his thoughts to the side, and nodded. "Ok. Well, uh..."

What could he say to fix this?

"Oh! That's why you have me!"

The tone Asriel used was much happier than he intended, but, to his pleasant surprise, it didn't offend the girl, and she instead looked at him in confusion. "What?"

The young goat-boy simply smiled, and shrugged. At this point, he might as well speak the truth. Mom always did say that it was the best policy. "Well, you might not have magic, but... I do. So, I'll help you with mine!"

It was the wholesome truth. He planned on doing it, anyway, even if she had ended up being a awesome mage regardless. He was always gonna be there for her, one way, or another. What else were best friends for?

"Asriel..."

"After all, we're best friends! I'll always be there for you anyway, so... magic help won't be anything extra, or anything. Besides, I'm a boss monster. Magic is kinda our thing."

The young human sighed in exasperation, and tried to give the young monster a frown, but ultimately failed. "We can't always be together..."

It was at this that Asriel stood up, and, on a whim, spoke up. He knew what he must do. "I make a boss monster promise. I'll always be there for you."

"You don't know what that means-"

"Nope, doesn't matter. We're best friends, so we'll be together forever!"

"But-"

"No matter what. Always."

The fallen child sat there for a moment, pondering the idea, before letting out a small, despondent sigh.

"Fine. Together forever. Always. You better mean that, Dreemur."

Asriel just gave her a smile, and nodded. He said what he ultimately felt, and that counted as a win in his book. He would be there for her, forever.

"Always."


	6. Chapter 6

"Chara, come on, we're starving!"

The young girl huffed in mild irritation at her impatient best friend's cry, before turning around, and giving the boy a scowl. When she had agreed to babysit for Doctor Gaster, she had assumed that it meant that she'd be watching little Sans for a few hours. And that was cake. 

However, something that wasn't cake was entertaining her easily bored and whiny best friend at the same time. The Boss monster apparently required constant stimulus, lest he suddenly decide to do something stupid, or, worse, agitating. 

"Azz, be patient. I'm not hungry yet."

But Asriel didn't take her words all that well, and instead huffed in irritation, much like she had done previously. "But little Sans is hungry! And we can't just let the little guy starve like that!"

It was all she had in her to keep from ending him right there. But no, she had to be patient. In a few hours, Gaster would return. She would get her payment. And then?

It'd be all over. She would be free to return the goat to it's petting zoo, and maybe, if she was still irritable, she could smother Asriel in his sleep when he tried to snuggle, as Boss monsters were want to do. She be free, well paid, and able to enact her righteous retribution upon the little fluff-ball at her leisure. 

And, the best part? 

He'd never suspect. He never could tell when he was getting on her nerves, which made her revenge-sprees all the more sweet. Because, she'd be able to look him in the eye, as she slowly put the pillow over his face, and-

*Growl* 

Chara swore internally, as Asriel's face lit up in a bright, smug grin.

There'd be no living with him after this.

"I thought you said you weren't hungry?"

Chara didn't reply, instead opting to turn around, and walked towards the kitchen. Perhaps, the smug goat-boy was right, and that it was, in fact, time to make Lunch.

But she wouldn't admit it to Asriel. She'd take that bit to her grave, even if he knew completely that, in the end, he was right. So, she kept that thought in mind while she searched entered the cooking space, and started to check the cupboards for something to make. It was a life-vest in the middle of the annoying sea that was an excitable Asriel. 

And so, she looked through the cupboards for a couple moments, before making a mental list. Macaroni and cheese was out of the question. The older Skeleton lacked the ingredients for the real thing, nor did he even have any of the instant stuff. 

Nor did he have the makings for Sandwiches, such as bread, or meat. Or cheese. Nor any vegetables. Or fruit. 

Or... well, even any canned soup. 

Chara blinked in both surprise and confusion as she did a mental tally. What did he have? He had to have something.

After another quick search she found that, well, He did have some bowls. The very basic ingredients, such as salt and pepper and a small amount of cinnamon. And... some ketchup and a few crackers.

And, like that, Chara had an blast from the past, along with a sudden realization. She knew exactly what she was gonna make.

"We're having tomato soup."

She hadn't really said it towards anyone in general, but seeing as Asriel was basically a lost puppy, he responded in kind. 

"Oh. Uh... How?"

Chara simply gave him a surprisingly kind smile, and pulled the salt and bowls from the cupboards, along with setting a sauce-pan on the stove. "I have my ways. Now, shoo. I'll call you when it's ready."

The small goat-boy sat there for a moment, but after another shoo-ing motion from Chara, he finally relented and walked off, choosing instead to go watch the small, tiny skeleton as he sat in his playpen, while Chara cooked.

So... First off, she needed a pot and some salt. But those were easy enough to find, and they were already on top of the stove. 

"Ok... let's see if I still remember how to do this. Uh.... some water..."

She proceeded to fill the pot a little under a quarter of the way with water, before pouring a decent amount of salt into the water. "Ok, and... add ketchup!"

In all honesty, she didn't need to use all of the ketchup, but, in her experience, the worst soup was the stuff that was watered down the most. So... extra ketchup meant better, right?

So, she stirred the "Soup" as she heated it, hoping desperately that she didn't somehow burn it. And, after a few minutes, she could smell the vague, nostalgic fragrance of "tomato" soup. She took a sip, and, to her relief, it was exactly as she remembered it, if not a tad better.

"Foods done!"

Chara smiled at the soup as she took it off of the stove top, and carried it over to the dinner table. Her cry had apparently attracted Asriel, as he was sitting beside the table dutifully. "Alright, Az, set up the table, while I get the tiny bag of bones."

The Goatboy nodded excitedly, and went off to get the bowls and spoons, while Chara went off to get the currently entrapped Sans. She quietly snuck into the room, and looked down at the child. He was awake, and surprisingly calm, staring up at her cheerfully.

"Hey, bud. Ya hungry?"

All she got was a blank stare, which vaguely annoyed her. The skeleton was three, nearing on four, and he normally wouldn't shut up. What changed?

'Welp, let's get you some food, bud."

She bent over and picked up the skeleton gently, and he gladly accepted the lift, making a happy giggle as she did so. "So, I hope you like tomato soup!"

Sans simply cocked his head to the side in confusion, and Chara couldn't help but lean in and whisper conspiratorially. "It's, like, nothing but ketchup and water. But, it should be alright."

The skeleton didn't respond immediately, but, when he did, he continued to look confused. 

"Wuts ketchup?"

"Well, little bones, you're about to find out."


	7. Chapter 7

Regardless of how... amazing Chara could be, as both a friend and a person, Asriel would've been the biggest liar in the planet if he said that she didn't do things that annoyed him.

For example, she was an absolute monster when it came to several things. Such as being touched. One moment, she was totally fine with being hugged, held, and snuggled, and the next, you could hug her, and get a elbow to your gut for your trouble, along with a scowl and avoidance for the entire day, without even a single word as to why she was so peeved at you.

She also could be very nitpicky. There was a certain way you did certain things in Chara's mind, and, God help you if you don't do it right. She would yell, or complain, or simply redo what you "Failed at" but in her way, often doubling the amount of time required for the task. She was like that when it came to knitting, or drawing. It HAD to be a certain color, or it HAD to be a specific style, never mind the fact that it was Asriel himself who taught her the basics in the first place. 

And, she was also very... quiet. But, that part was the part that bothered Asriel the most. If there was something wrong, she wouldn't say anything until it reached the literal breaking point, and, even then, she wouldn't tell you what was wrong, instead opting for a singular, focus-less explosion of emotion, often unrelated to the actual problem. And, once she was done, She'd just sit around, either mopey, or angry, leaving Asriel and his parents to figure out what they, or someone else, did to earn her ire. 

Which, in a surprising twist, was a surprisingly difficult thing to do. Which only meant that, when it did happen, there was an actual, genuine problem. Not some small slight, but a actual, he should actually tell mom-and-dad Problem. A problem that he knew nothing about, because she wouldn't even tell him the darn thing. There might be some evil monster wanting to steal her Soul, or a bully down the street that takes her baby-sitting money. She might even be really sick, and they need to find some mysterious flower that was only found in the depths of the deepest tunnels. 

But she'd never tell. Nope. She'd rather sit around, angry, and hit him in the head with a pillow when he tried to get into their bed. 

'No, Az. It's a hundred degrees tonight."

He had no clue why she was so angry, but, he was determined to find out.


	8. Chapter 8

"Asriel, are you even listening?"

Chara's tone was mildly irritated. After all, she had been trying to discuss this topic with Asriel for the past ten minutes. But, instead of focusing on their math homework, like a good little goat, he had instead chose to focus on a much less... useful venture. Like doodling. And making a point to ignore her completely.

"Az. Come on."

Still nothing. She gave the boy a roll of the eyes, before poking him in the ribs. Surely, that would do it.

But, after a sharp, fast poke, the only response the small goatboy had to give was to look her way and give a half-hearted "Huh?" before immediately returning to his drawing. Chara couldn't help but scowl, before letting out another huff. 

"Asriel!"

This time, her tone was more aggressive, and the Boss monster jolted slightly in surprise, before looking over to her, a small frown on his face. "Uh, what?"

The light, almost annoyed tone the boy had rankled her anger further, but Chara held back the urge to give another attempt at smothering the idiot, and, instead, forced her irritation out in an explosive sigh. It wasn't his fault he was a dumb fuzzy moron. It was simply the universe's. He knew not what he did. He'd just sit there, being a big, stupid, goat. And would continue to do so, until he had smaller, slightly less stupid goat-kids. Kids who would then fill the world with dumb.

Hmm. Maybe it was for the best if she did smother him. Prevent the big, dumb, stupid gene from continuing it's reign of terror.

She'd be a hero. The savior of monster-kind, the last bastion of light to ward off the encroaching dumb-ness. The hero that monster-kind did not want, but deserved.

And all it would take was a pillow. Much like the one that sat beside her, dutifully awaiting for it's time to be used, for justice.

It would be so easy. Super easy.

"So, do ya think I should make your shirt green, or blue- MMPH!?!"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> No goats were harmed in the making of this chapter.


	9. Chapter 9

He always knew that this day would come.

It was inevitable, especially with the arrival of Chara. After all, his son was definitely, irrefutably a boy, and Chara was, well, a girl. But Asgore had desperately hoped that he would have had more time. His son was eleven, for pete's sake. He should find himself concerned that girls had cooties, or that math was, indeed, a dreadfully boring waste of time. But of course, he had no such luck. His son was very much like his mother, pushing the limits, and, to his elation/chagrin, asking why to just about everything.

"Dad?"

But even with that knowledge, He had no idea how to broach the subject. He never had thought to plan out a response, out of a mixture of procrastination, and hope that he would instead ask his mother. Toriel loved answering questions. She wouldn't even hesitate to wade into the deep, terrifying pool that was reproduction and birth. If anything, she probably had pictures handy. Cold, clinical, informative pictures.

She would do so much better than he could. Heck, he was certain that even Chara could best his efforts. And, had she not been ill with the flu, he was sure that she would've stepped in by now.

"Uh, Dad? Should I get mom?"

But... his son went to him, not Toriel, nor Chara. He could not disappoint his son in such a way.

As such, Asgore forced steel into his heart, and finally, after only a minute of staring blankly into space, daintily holding his half-filled teacup, he finally managed to form a proper sentence.

"Er, Asriel... Why are you concerning yourself with such... knowledge?"

His son, to his credit, looked rather sheepish at his question. "Er... I was talking to some kids down at the park, and... uh, well, it kinda came up."

The king of the monsters suddenly feared for the youth of this generation.

"But, what they were saying made no sense! There's no way that holding hands makes babies!"

And like that, The king of the monsters suddenly felt relief. He now had an out, in case he suddenly couldn't handle the task.

"You... you would be correct. That is not the way in which children are made."

He was doing good. He glanced over to Asriel, and saw the inquisitive, eager expression on his face. It drove a icicle into his heart, and he forced a serene, calm expression on his face as he sipped his tea.

"Children are made when one..."

He couldn't do this, abort!

"...Sleeps with another. When a pair of monsters love each other, they share a bed, and thus, create a child."

Asgore couldn't bear to look his son in the eye, so, he instead sipped at his tea once more, keeping the forced expression of calm on his face. He wasn't wrong, per sae, but he had kept some very important details out of the description. 

"Uh... Er... Ok. Um, how do you know when someone is pregnant?"

It took everything he had to keep from spitting out his tea. Why would Asriel wish to know that? Desperately, Asgore searched for a suitable answer. 

"A... common effect would be vomiting. Commonly referred to as morning sickness."

There was a moment of silence after that, before Asriel, to his surprise, quickly pattered off. Asgore couldn't help but let loose a sigh of relief, before smiling.

"That went better than expected.'

Asgore took one final sip of his nearly drained cup, and-

"MOOOOOOM! CHARA'S PREGNANT!"

Immediately spat it right out.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eh, consider this extra chapter as my way of saying "Sorry for randomly disappearing for so long for no reason". 
> 
> I'll try to make another ASAP.


	10. Chapter 10

Asriel was a puzzle.

And to her irritation, he was one that made absolutely no sense to Chara. Which was worrying, because if there was one thing Chara understood, it was people.

And people always wanted something. No one did something, simply because they had selfless intentions. The street dancer who first taught Chara who taught her to dance? She wanted a legacy. The head of the dance hall, who offered to adopt her off the street? They wanted the dancing style Chara had learned, along with... other things.

But Asriel? He did so many kind things for her. Gave her his chocolates, drew nice, pretty pictures just for her, and sometimes, brought her flowers, like little dandelions. And yet, he never asked for some sort of reward. It set her teeth on edge, it made her paranoid.

He had to be up to something. Maybe he was playing the long con, or making sure that she owed him, and was simply holding off until he could use the debts in a lump sum.

"Hey Chara! I drew you this!"

Disgusting.

But, regardless of her flawless, adamantium-esque logic, she took the picture, and looked it over. It was, like usual, pretty good. It got her good side, and, he chose to give her that red sweater that she liked so much, before she outgrew it.

What game was he playing at? Was he planning something?

Chara remained on that thought for a moment, before stopping herself. _Was_ he even planning something? This was Asriel she was thinking about, after all. He was a stinkin' cinnamon roll. Sweet, sugary, and filled entirely with hot air. Chara didn't even know if Asriel knew the meaning of "malicious."

If anything, she wouldn't have been surprised if he thought it was another word for "Delicious."

"Well, we should probably go to bed. Mom said we have a "field trip" tomorrow."

Chara groaned, and gave a nod as she continued to stare at the picture for another moment. Nope, regardless of what she wanted, the picture refused to give up it's secrets. As such, she gave a small huff, and grabbed her pajamas, walking irritably to the bathroom. She could probably spend the next week trying to decipher what Asriel could possibly be plotting, and get no closer than she already was.

It took only a minute to get changed, and the instant she returned, she picked up the picture again, before giving a sigh, and hopping into her bed. She felt a pair of fuzzy arms wrap around her, but she still focused on the picture for a moment, hoping that she would somehow spot the hidden intent in the drawing.

"Night, Chara!"

The girl gave a sigh, before shaking her head, and snuggling into the hug, letting the paper fall to the floor. She'd find out what he wanted of her, if it was the death of her.

"Night, Azzy."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Here y'all are. Another chapter of questionable quality!
> 
> Just like mom used to make.


	11. Chapter 11

Asriel, after what seemed to be forever, finally brought himself out of what Chara called "Art mode", lifted the pencil off of the paper, and sighed. This was most definitely gonna be his best work yet.

 

And so, he pulled back, and looked at the picture with a grin.

 

But, after a minute, his grin disappeared, as he stared blankly at his drawing for several continuous moments, not really sure how to handle the image.

 

He knew what it meant. After all, he was the one who drew it. But still, he hadn't really put much thought into what he drew, until after he drew it. He just... drew what came to mind.

 

And normally, that was a good thing. It allowed him to vent, to keep from bottling things up. 

 

But, surely he would've known about this sooner, right?

 

No. The drawing didn't lie. And, not only did it not lie, but it also answered several questions he had been asking himself, in the dead of night. It was, in Chara's words, a testament to all his sins.

 

So, regardless of the picture's worth, in both quality, (He felt he had done an amazing job at drawing it) and what it meant to him, he could not leave it intact. If Mom found it, she would bring it up every day from now, until the end of time, making those dumb little "aws" and saying "how cute" it was. And Chara? It would make her jabs at him being girly and all wussy completely legit, at least in her eyes.

  
Heck, when he looked at it, Asriel felt that she actually had a point.

 

So, yeah, it had to die. He'd remember it fondly, and he wished it the best of luck on it's trip to Drawing-Valhalla, but it had to go.

 

So, without a second thought, he threw it into the empty fireplace, and gave the paper a quick jolt of fire magic. He even watched it for several seconds, making sure that it was truly and properly burned, before grabbing the nearby poker, and scrambling the ashes out of fear of reconstructive spells. 

 

It was for the best.

 

And, besides, he was pretty sure he'd see Chara in a wedding dress soon enough, anyway. 


	12. Chapter 12

Dreemur was gonna die. Sure, the little fuzzball could run faster than Chara, but she didn't care. Because, in the end, he was a fuzzball. And even if she couldn't catch him, he was fluffy, both in body and in spirit. All she'd have to do was wait until he suddenly decided that, like every day, he needed his daily fluffle-hug, or his scritch-a-scratch, and he'd come to her. And then, she'd destroy him.

But that didn't mean that she was gonna give up. No, there would be no mercy to those who put enchantments on her shower with _ice magic_.

"Ha! You should look at your hair!"

There would be vengeance. There wasn't a snowball's chance in...

She stopped in that thought for a moment, before letting out a furious growl. She was gonna kill him. Slowly, and painfully. She tried to grin past her chattering teeth, but, all she managed was a vicious scowl, which only served to make the boy run even faster.

But, as she chased him throughout the house, Chara knew one thing. 

Regardless of if she caught him or not, he was totally gonna sleep on the couch tonight. 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor flufflebutt. We knew him well.


	13. The party, part 1

The day had arrived.

Asriel was finally, totally 12. It wasn't the biggest occasion in the terms of birthdays, but still, it meant gifts.

Guests.

A moderately sized party.

But, that wasn't what had him excited. No, what had made him excited was the fact that his party was _in the style of a royal ball_.

He had been looking forward to this party since it had got the theme set in stone, several months ago. A Royal ball was an adult thing. An adult thing that he had been barred from going to, due to his "supposed" inability to keep quiet, or the fact that he could, when pressed, point out small, uncomfortable, yet true facts, like how the noble of Hotland was balding, or that the mistress of the the deep-falls looked very much like a whale in that outfit, when she was actually a porpoise.

But now? He was the master of his very own royal ball. He was the metaphorical king, instead of the young, still-growing Prince. And, he could do anything he wanted. Within reason, of course. Sure, he would be wrapped up in the trappings of royalty, sure, but that wouldn't matter. He was actually pretty good when it came to protocol, and even if he had to greet everyone that entered and joined the party, he was sure that he'd still have tons of fun.

After all, there was gonna be music, and dancing, and food. He was already dressed up in one of his fanciest get-ups. All he currently had to do was wait for for the party to properly start. That, and find Chara, who had disappeared at some point.

Maybe she had left to get dressed up in some attempt at being the... what did mother call it? The belle of the ball?

Asriel rolled that idea around for a moment, before smiling and rolling his eyes at the audacity of the idea. Chara was, well, Chara. She would always the prettiest, regardless of what she wore, so the idea of competition was laughable. But maybe, he'd somehow get lucky regardless, and she'd actually wear a dress, or something.

Even if it was extremely unlikely. She had an unnatural aversion to dressing up in what she always called "Fru-fru garbage", always saying that she wasn't some "piece of meat." But maybe, just maybe, God would smile upon him, and she'd decide to humor him, and wear _some_ sort of dress. 

Heck, he'd take her dancing practice outfit over her traditional sweater. But, hey, Chara wasn't a beast he could control, and Asriel knew that very well. If she so choose to wear a sweater, he'd happily accept it, lest she finally make good on that threat of banishing him to the dreaded couch for all eternity.

"Hello, Dearest Prince."

Asriel blinked, torn from his thoughts, before noticing the "guest" before him. They were bowing, formally, and Asriel fell back on the teachings his mother gave him to respond. He gave the required nod and smile, and shook the young monster's offered tentacle.

"Welcome. Please, try a refreshment."

His thoughts on Chara would have to wait. His guests were arriving, and as such, his attention would have to be on them.

"Hello, Master Asriel."

Another smile, a nod, and an welcome.

"Hello, Prince!"

A smile, and nod, and a greeting.

"Hiya, chump!"

A forced, slightly toothy smile, a raised eyebrow, and a not-entirely-insulting greeting. He always hated Jerry.

This was monotonous. Now, he could see why his father hated hosting royal events. They were boring.

This continued on for a while, until he got a hefty, massive, bone-breaking hug from a small-ish Fish-esque monster.

"Hiya, Champ! Happy Birthday!"

Asriel barely could let out a squeak, as he felt his bone try their hardest to keep from collapsing.

"Undyne, enough."

The tone the girl's parent had was scolding, and, Asriel was released, and he barely managed to keep from dropping to the floor. He let out a small, if dignified cough, and forced himself to keep from groaning. "Oh, it's-*Cough*-alright."

The young girl, Undyne, apparently, smiled brilliantly at that, and Asriel couldn't help but mirror her enthusiasm. It was contagious. "Well, uh, anyway, Feel free to get a drink, or a snack, or-"

"Where's yer royal guard?"

Asriel blinked at that, surprised by the question. "Uh, I don't-"

"Ya gotta have one! Oh! I know, I'll be it!"

It took the young boss monster a second to understand what she meant by it, but after a moment, he felt a smile grow. "Alright! You can totally be my guard, and then we'll get a-"

Wait, he almost lost himself for a moment. He had to do this right. Dignified, like Dad. Collected, like mom.

"Oh, er, yes. I... agree to this arrangement."

The younger fish monster grinned, and gave a hearty nod, before pulling a toy sword from seemingly nowhere. 

"I'll protect you from everyone! No humans shall get past me!"

Asriel just gave a small, amused nod, and turned to the next guest. The party was already looking like it would be amazing.


	14. The party, part 2

"Chara, dear, hold still."

The young girl sighed for what felt like the hundredth time in the past hour, but immediately did as she was told. She knew, from experience, that the more she struggled, the longer this would take. And she refused to continue with this for longer than was strictly necessary.  

"We're gonna be late."

But that didn't mean she couldn't complain. That was her saving grace. She may be forced to heel, but she wouldn't stop barking. But, instead of getting a acknowledgement or a refutal, all she got in response was an amused noise from Toriel as she continued to work on her hair, which irked the young human to no end.

"Don't worry, dear. The party isn't supposed to start until six. Besides, we want your hair to be perfect for your first dance with Asriel."

Chara simply gave a small scoff at that. She had absolutely no idea where everyone had gotten the idea that she even wanted to dance with Asriel, but they all seemed to be working off of that assumption. Yes, she was going to the party, apparently dressed up as much as she possibly could, and yes, she would probably humor the poor boy, and give him a single dance. But she hadn't said anything about her plans in that regard, beyond accepting the forced dress-up session.

"But he's got two left feet."

"Hm. Not everyone can be skilled at dancing, Chara. And, I'll have you know that Asgore cannot tango or waltz for the life of him. But that doesn't mean I won't accompany him to the dance floor, whenever he chooses to go."

The girl simply rolled her eyes. That wasn't even close to being the same thing. They had promises, and knowing Toriel and Asgore, they undoubted had a "join each other at the dance floor" clause in their wedding vows. It certainly sounded like them. "Yeah, but you're married. It's not even close to the same thing."

Toriel just gave another amused sound at that, which irked Chara more. She hated being treated like a kid. But, Toriel either didn't notice, or care, and instead gave a small tug at her hair. "Almost done, dear."

She had said that seemingly an hour ago. But, Chara continued to sit still for a moment, before letting her mind wander onto different, irritating things. Such as the flowing, golden cloth that sat around her ankles. The girl stared at them for a moment, before kicked her feet slightly, and watching the cloth flow with a shimmer.

"Ugh. So... why do I have to wear a dress?"

The Boss-Monster smiled a bit at that as she continued to work on the obstinate girl's hair. "For multiple reasons."

Another groan. "Such as?"

"Such as the party being a formal occasion. Such as you being the Princess, going to a formal party. Such as the fact that we ensured your outfit matching with Asriel's. The two of you will look so cute, sitting beside each other."

"Why do I have to be the Princess?"

"Because Asriel is the Crown Prince. The two of you are destined to rule beside each other."

The girl simply gave another irritable noise. She hated having talks with Toriel. Because, when the two sat side-by-side, Chara somehow turned into a small child, unsure and unsteady, while Toriel stood up tall and sure. It was so much better when she went up against Asriel, or Asgore. Asriel was... Asriel, a big fluffball who fell over the instant Chara asked of it. And Asgore, he treated everyone with respect. But Toriel acted as if you were a small child, and then somehow proved it through sheer Mom-ness. 

It sucked. Chara had no idea how to work with Mom-ness, and it showed. 

"Tilt your head to the left, please."

Chara did as Toriel requested, and tilted her head, but not before letting out another sigh. 

Asriel better appreciate this.

* * *

The party was in full swing, and yet, Chara was nowhere to be found. 

Asriel wasn't surprised, per sae, but he _was_ disappointed. Sure, he was sure that she'd show up. He even had her promise and everything. But still, Asriel had hoped that she could have bothered to make it to the party on time. 

"Hey! Hands off da Prince!"

Upon hearing the shout from his small "bodyguard", Asriel rolled his eyes, his irritation at both the situation, and the small girl showing. At the beginning, her antics had been vaguely amusing. Funny, even. But after the fifth "attack" on monsters who tried to get close, even if only to offer him congratulations for his birthday, and it had gone from amusing, to irksome. 

And, add the fact that the girl asked a strange, off the wall question every couple seconds, and Asriel found himself quite... bothered.

"Asriel, Honey."

The younger Boss monster nearly jumped at the voice, before smiling happily. Took them long enough.

But, the instant he got turned around, he found that it was only his mother, and he couldn't help but let out a small sigh of exasperation. "Mom? Where's Chara?"

Toriel just offered her son a small smile, seemingly not caring about her luke-warm reception. "Don't worry, dear, She's with your father. He insisted that he be the one to escort her. We both know how emotional he can get."

Asriel rolled his eyes at that. Yeah... Dad could get awfully emotional at times. But, It was usually over the stupidest things. After all, why would Dad care if Chara was at a birthday party anyway? Sure, they would be happy, but getting all sappy and escorting Chara made absolutely no sense.

It had to be an adult thing. And, at the rate they were going, he doubted he'd ever understand them, either.

"Whoa! Are you, like, the queen?"

At the question, Asriel suddenly had a realization. He really, really, _really_  had to keep Undyne and Chara from meeting. After all, the young boss monster wasn't letting normal monsters get close enough to even greet him. And, if she wouldn't let normal monsters say hello, he doubted that she'd let a human get close, or, heaven forbid, actually talk to him.

Never mind the possibility of a hug.

And, furthermore, he highly doubted that Chara would take that sitting down. 

It'd be like fire meeting oil. He had to keep the two away from each other.

"Uh... Undyne? Why don't you take a break?"

The fish monster rolled her eyes at that, before giving her rebuttal.

"Royal guards don't take breaks!"

The boy gave a groan. If Chara was on her way, he needed to get Undyne away from here, quick. 

"Uh..."

Dangit, he had nothing.

"Actually, Royal Guards are unionized. They are required by law to take breaks."

Asriel looked over at his mom in surprise. 

"And, as queen, It is my job to ensure that all the guards take breaks, as needed. So... Undyne, is it? Would you accompany me to the snack table?"

The younger monster looked conflicted, but, after a moment, nodded. "Uh... Ok."

 Wow, Mom to the rescue. Asriel gave her a thankful smile as she walked away with the young monster in tow, and he shook his head. Now, all he needed was Chara, and his birthday would be complete. 

 

 

 

 


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> EVERYBODY RUN! ITS THE CHAPTITIZER!

Dresses sucked.

Granted, it wasn't like Chara wasn't used to being forcibly dressed up and shown off. It was simply part of life; you put on airs, made yourself look your best, and showed off your worth, if not in material possessions, than in physical attributes that your heritage brought upon you naturally. It was a dance as old as time, and it was doubtful that it would ever truly change.

Didn't mean she liked being shown off like she was some prize winning dog, though. Sure, she knew consciously that it wasn't the case, that Asriel wanted this party to make himself feel less like a child, and more like an adult. But still, there was that small, irksome feeling in the back of her head that screamed otherwise.

Good thing it was easy to ignore. She had plenty of experience in ignoring that voice.

"Do you see Asriel yet?"

The tone Asgore held was, like always, soft and calm, and Chara had to strain a bit to hear him over the sounds of the party.

"No, I don't."

"Well, let's go check near the thrones."

Chara barely could keep from rolling her eyes. Of course there would be thrones. It was Asriel, after all. When he wasn't bugging her, he was proclaiming that he couldn't wait to be king. She had no idea why he would want to be in charge and responsible for everyone, but he did. 

He was a fool. But, luckily he had her to keep his fluffy butt in check.

”Oh, there you are, dear. Asriel has been looking for you.”

Chara nodded gently at that, taking a breath to steady herself before putting on a demure smile and straightening her shoulders. 

“Of course, milady. May I ask where he may be?”

Toriel just shook her head before  scooping the child up in a gentle hug. 

“Don’t, Chara. Relax. This is a party.”

It took the girl a moment before she properly understood what Toriel meant, but once she did she nodded and relaxed. 

“Alright. Uh, so where is the fluffball anyway?”

”By the front doors.”

Chara nodded once more, and moved towards the door. She’d give him a birthday he’d never forget.

 


End file.
